Yesterday was our first trip to the zoo. It was something we had been wanting to do since this summer. I had been anticipating Elina discovering new things, being immersed in fascination. Not so much. Elina was mostly preoccupied with a.) getting snacks and b.) smacking the glass tanks whenever possible. Despite this age-appropriate behavior, we had a great time.
As we wheeled our girl around I people watched. I saw so many babies and children being pushed, carried, and chased. Instead of finding myself obsessing over how old they might be or what they could do developmentally I realized that in the end, they are all just kids. Just babies, at the zoo. It didn't matter in that moment how gifted or "normal" they were; and it doesn't need to matter anywhere else.
So much of the time I forget to just let her be a kid. Thankfully, yesterday was not one of those days.
Elina is a kid first. Her life should not revolve around concerns and preoccupations about one aspect of who she is. I have said Elina is not down syndrome, and yet it is usually the thing I think of first when I talk or reflect about my girl. I don't want her to fixate on one part of her identity, but to see herself as a multi-faceted, ever-transforming human being. If she ends up being a gymnast, then she is not just a gymnast. If she has down syndrome, she is not just down syndrome. She is Elina, and she is a girl much like any other.
...and I couldn't be happier with who my Elina is revealing herself to be.
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